Cricket - The Religion

"Cricket is Religion and Sachin is God"
"Cricket is the only Religion that more than 95% Indians follow"

By now you must have started thinking that this is just another article on how popular cricket is in India, but i feel very happy to let you know that this is not about popularity of cricket in India but article trying to give idea about Religion called cricket.

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THE country of 1Billion and one Religion, no difference of opinions, no different paths, no different belief ...

I don't think it is possible to have, as the thing we are talking about is Religion.

Different Path:

Hinduism has many path Brahmin, Vaishnav etc as Christianity, Isalm etc and cricket is no different.

We have so many path to follow in cricket

1) Test Cricket 2) One Day Cricket 3) T-20s 

or

1) Batsmen 2) Bowlers

or Country you are from

Different Believers:

We have Theists(who practice religion), Pantheists (believe in every thing), atheists (believe in nothing)

Theists are those who follow particular religion,  they are the FANATICS. You can find many of this category, they will be on streets shouting n screaming with a Flag of religion they follow in hand.

Pantheists are those who watch cricket for fun, they are the critics. It doesnt matter to them who wins or who loose, they just want good cricket and good competition and enjoy the game

Atheists are those who proclaim they hate cricket or they dont watch BS game of cricket, they are the one whom you will find in every office, at every corner of street who knows nothing about cricket and cant understand game of cricket and keep on ridiculing it. 

God:

Ah! This is most important part.

This is the most controversial and debated part of the religion, Who is the God?

but i think most of the Indians will agree Sachin is God of Cricket,

as we(Indians) have Sachin Tendulkar, Aussies have Donald Bradman, Windies has Brian Lara, Pakistanis have Wasim Akram .

When it comes to batting there is a big debate about "Great". Who is the God? Sachin or Bradman or Lara??? but most of the modern cricketers as well as fans do agree that Sachin is the God.

In balling, therse hasnt been any clear result abuot being God. There are many good contestants like Muthaiya Murlidharan, Shane Warne, Glen McGrath, Wasim Akram, being an Indian i can put Kapil Dev , Dennis Lillee but there is no a clear winner 

Followers:

What you need to do or know to be a follower???

The answer is just NOTHING.

What you need to do is get infront of the Tv(or computer or projector) and start watching Cricket, start talking about cricket, start commenting about cricket though you dont know a shit about it. Scream when team you are supporting wins, jump when your favorite batsman hits century or bowler takes wicket. Scream when your team looses, your favorite player doesnt play well. Worship the God of cricket, make wishes for your team or player. 

I think this is enough .... i ll tell u more in next blog ... 

till then keep reading and dont forget to klik some ads ;)

15 minutes before the Start

So, here I was at Shailesh J Mehta School of Management, IIT-Bombay(not Mumbai :P ) waiting for my Gd/PI process for Vinod Gupta School of Management, IIT-Kharagpur to start. The time printed in call letter was 2:00PM so i reached at 1:35 n was waiting for clock to hit 2:00.

To my surprise when i entered there was pin drop silence, no1 was talking(including girls :-O ) n there was no student coordinator (later i came to know it was handled by faculties only). I sat there for a while n searching for some familiar face or someone with whom i can break the ice and as expected there was no1 i found with whom i could talk. While i was searching for some1 to talk with n looking around the room a thought hit me "What others might be thinking right now?" n then i looked around at every1's face tried to figure out what he/she might be thinking ... here are few ..

So here we go ....

1) A guy sitting near to entry (third row-First Sit)
White Shirt, no Tie, clean shaved, rectangular while pale face n looking around with WTF expression on the face

"Damm why there is so much silence, it seems like someone has died or is this "तुफान के पेहले की खमोशी". (lookin at guy who was reading news paper) That faggot thinks that he can get all the knowledge about current affairs by reading news paper just one day , screw him ... "

(n den the guy went out)

2) A Sardarji (third row-second seat)
White shirt with blue stripes, blue tie, dark blue turban, big beard n exasperatedly looking at the guy who was reading news paper

"साल्ला चु** , इसे लगता है कि ये साला अखबार पढ के GD मे फाड देगा ....
बेटा आजा तु GD मे , तेरी तो मे मार के रख दुन्गा"

3) A Guy (most probably south Indian) (third row-third seat)
Again while shirt with grey stripes, light blue tie, neatly combed hair, dark skin n intensely looking into the news paper that the guy beside him was reading

"Oh let me read this, who knows they might ask me important news . Oh ... that a**hole is reading so quickly i couldnt read it completely .dammm this a**hole .. "

4) Guy reading news paper (third row-fourth seat)
I coudnt see his face, he was too lost in reading news paper :P

5) A Gal (Miracle) (second row-first seat)
Fatso, big spectacles, dark skin complexion, a gal with whom u ll never fight :P
Her face was too complex for a naive like me to read so i didn try to read her face :D

6) A Gal n that also so prettty (Super Miracle) (first Row-first seat)
Light Blue Shirt, Fair skin, very slander body, hair falling on shoulder, frameless spectacles, white pale face

"ohh this guys, they are all starting me n that guy in dark blue shirt(me) he has been starting at me so badly, ****. It seems i am the most beautiful gal in the room beside that gal in last row (third row-17th seat), she looks kinda bi**hy, look at her , she is wearing so much makeup ... lovely lipstick n bla bla bla (there must b many things but i dont know much about gals' makeup :P) "

7) A Suit (third row-13th seat)
Dark Blues suit, clean shaved face, good height(must be more than 6"2') ..overall smarty ...

"Oh, look at these bunch of faggots sitting in silence, it seems like some1 has died at this shitty place, let GD/PI start soon, this silence is killin me ..."

You must be wondering what i was thinking at that time ... so lemme tell u
i was thinkin to write this whole experience on my blog coz as i dont pots much on my blog this thing i thought ll b fresh n kool ... :P

there were few other interesting observations too but i forgot em ...
n i couldnt face read that "bi**hy" gal as she was sitting just behind me :P

Why i prefer Guitar over Gal

I am big time guitar freak to extent that once my Ex-GF told me that i love my guitar more then her and after that i thought about it and it turned out that she was right.
After we broke up, i sat down n googled and thought some reasons why guitar is better then gals and why i prefer guitar over gals ...

So, here we go,

· Guitars don't care how many other Guitars you've played.

· Guitars don't care how many other Guitars you have.

· Guitars don't care if you look at other Guitars.

· Guitars don't care if you buy Guitar magazines.

· You'll never hear, "Surprise, you are going to be the proud father of a new Guitar" unless you go out to buy one yourself.

· You don't have to worry about getting caught with your guitar.

· Guitars don't get pregnant.

· You can share your Guitar with your friends.

· You can play your Guitar any time of the month.

· Guitars don't have parents.

· Guitars don't whine... unless you want them to.

· If your Guitar is flat you can fix it for less than Rs 1,000.



· Your Guitar doesn't care if you never listen to it.

· You don't have to be jealous of the guy who works on your Guitar.

· If you say bad things to your Guitar, you don't have to apologize before you play it again.

· You can play your Guitar as long as you want and it won't get sore.

· You can stop playing your Guitar as soon as you want and it won't get frustrated.

· Your parents won't remain in touch with your old Guitar after you dump it.

· Guitars don't get headaches.

· Guitars don't insult you if you're a bad player.

· Your Guitar never wants a night out with the other Guitars.

· Guitars don't care if you're late.

· You don't have to take a shower before you play your Guitar.

· If your Guitar doesn't look good you can refinish it or get new parts.

· You can play your Guitar the first time you meet it, without having to take it to dinner, see a movie, or meet its mother.

· The only protection you have to wear when playing your Guitar is a decent thumb pick.

· When in mixed company, you can talk about what a great time you had the last time you played your Guitar.

· A guitar has a volume knob.

· If you break a guitar's G-string, it only costs Rs 11 for a new one.

· You can go to a guitar shop and play all the guitars you want for free.

· You can take lessons on how to play a guitar without feeling embarrassed.

· You can rent a guitar without worrying about who rented it before you.

· A guitar doesn't take half of everything you own when you get rid of it.

· You can break a guitars neck when it pisses you off and NOT go to prison

· You can finger it in public and get applause – NOT ARRESTED

· You can use four fingers at a time on it

· You can finger it for hours without it complaining for more

Messenger

"When the government fears the people, it is called democracy. When the people fear the government, it is called tyranny." Thomas Jefferson

Tyranny, I think it the correct word to describe environment in the countries where government and government organizations can do anything with its people and don't even care for justice of its people. Everyone of these was enjoying unprecedented power and monopoly until a guy called Julliean Assange started a website called wikileaks.com and started publishing all the secret documents that would have never reached to ordinary people without wikileaks.

Wikileaks, a website started with objective of exposing oppressive regimes in Asia, the former Soviet bloc, Sub-Saharan Africa and the Middle East, but also expect to be of assistance to people of all regions who wish to reveal unethical behaviour in their governments and corporations, published its first document in December 2006 and now it is roaring at 1.2million documents.

What made wikileaks different from other way opening government fraud is that before one has to goto media submit it and then wait while wikileaks provided platform to virtually anybody who gets his hands on classified material, to publish such files online for all to see. In starting, 2008, wikileaks used to simple release documents but in last summer it adopted journalistic approach and started editing and posting views about document. In july wikileaks partnered with main stream media by giving them early look at Afghan War diary. In November it published 250,000 diplomatic cables , of USA, describing tension across the globe and the reaction was huge. Wikileaks was all over in media,news paper,Tv, magazines and what not? It earned lot of fame to wikileaks and lot of criticism and wince of politicians.

Founder of EFF (Electronic Frontier Foundation) and lyricist John Perry wrote “The field of battle is WikiLeaks, You are the troops”. Last week when US government attempted to stop wikileaks those “troops” fought back. When US senator Joe Liberman urged amazon.com to stop wikileaks and amazon did it, thote troops attacked amazon.com, and by two days WikiLeaks listed 507 Web addresses that it said were hosting the site worldwide. When PayPal, MasterCard and Visa all blocked donations to WikiLeaks. WikiLeaks' backers fought back, though their hacker attacked on some of the sites that shut off WikiLeaks funding may be less effective. After some political pressure and wikileaks proclaim that it was done for “no obvious reason”, the accounts were restored[wikipedia].

While founder is Jullian Paul Assange is behind the bars in sweden under charges of unprotected sex, every one is eagerly waiting for result of this fight between David and Goliath.

What being normal means?

1. Normal is anything that makes us forget who we are and what we want. that way we can work in order to produce, reproduce and earn money.
2. Setting out rules for waging war (Geneva Convention)
3. Spending years to study at university to to find at the end of it all that you are unemployed.
4. Working 9-5 everyday at something that gives you no pleasure at all just so that , after 30 years you can retire.
5. Retiring and discovering that you no longer have energy to enjoy life and dying few years later in sheer boredom.
6. Using botox.
7. Believing that power is much more important than money and money is much more important than happiness.
8. Making fun of anyone who seeks happiness rather than money and accusing them of "Lacking Ambition".
9. Never talking to strangers.
10. Saying nasty things about neighbors.
11. Comparing objects like car, house, clothes and defining life according to those comparison instead of trying to find out real reason for being alive.
12. Believing that your parents are always right.

13. Getting married, having children and staying togather long after all love has died ,saying it is for good of children.

14. Criticizing anyone who tries to be different.
15. Waking up each morning to an hysterical alarm on bed side table.
16. Believing absolutely everything that appears in print.
17. Wearing a scrap of colored cloth around your neck which serves no purpose but which answers to name of "Tie".
18. Never asking direct questions , even though other person can guess that what it is you want to know.
19. Keeping smile on our lips even when you are on verge of crying. Feeling sorry for those who show their feelings.
20. Believing that art is either worth of fortune or worth nothing at all.
21. Despising anything that was easy to achieve because if no sacrifice was involved , it obviously is not worth having.
22. Following current fashion trend, however ridiculous or uncomfortable.
23. Believing that all famous people have tons of money saved up.
24. Investing a lot of time and money in caring bout external beauty and caring little about inner beauty.
25. Using every means possible to show that, although you are just ordinary human being, you area far above other mortals.
26. Never looking at anyone in eye when you are traveling on public transport, in case it is interpreted as a sign that you want to get rid off with them.
27. Standing facing the door in lift and pretending you are the only person in lift, regardless of how crowded it is.
28. Never laughing too loudly in restaurant however good the joke is.
29. Always dressing according to season, bare arms in spring and woolen jackets in autumn.
30. Covering christmas tree with fake snow even though winter has nothing to do with birth of Christ.
31. Assuming, as you grow older you are guardian of world's wisdom, even though you haven't necessarily lived enough to know what's right and what's wrong.
32. Going to charity tea party and thinking you have done your bit toward putting an end to social inequality in the worlds.
33. Eating three times a day even though you are not hungry.
34. Believing that other people are always better than you - better looking, more capable richer, more intelligent - and that its very dangerous to step outside your own limits, so its best to do nothing.
35. Using you car as weapon and as impenetrable armour.
36. Swearing when in heavy traffic.
37. Believing that everything you child does wrong is entirely down to company he/she keeps.
38. Marrying the first person who offers you decent position in society. Love can wait.
39. Always saying "i tried" when you didn't try at all.
40. Postponing doing the really interesting things in life for later when you won't have energy for it.
41. Avoiding depression with large daily dose of television / computer.
42. Believing that you can be sure of everything you have achieved.
43. Assuming that women don't like football and men are not interested in home decoration and cooking.
44. Blaming government for all bad things that happen.
45. Thinking that being good, decent, respectable person will man that other will see you as weak , vulnerable and easy to manipulate.
46. Being equally convinced that aggression and rudeness are synonymous with having "Powerful personality".
47. Being afraid of having endoscopy (if you are man) and giving birth (if you are woman)

Paulo Coelho Roxxxx