I am big time guitar freak to extent that once my Ex-GF told me that i love my guitar more then her and after that i thought about it and it turned out that she was right.
After we broke up, i sat down n googled and thought some reasons why guitar is better then gals and why i prefer guitar over gals ...
So, here we go,
· Guitars don't care how many other Guitars you've played.
· Guitars don't care how many other Guitars you have.
· Guitars don't care if you look at other Guitars.
· Guitars don't care if you buy Guitar magazines.
· You'll never hear, "Surprise, you are going to be the proud father of a new Guitar" unless you go out to buy one yourself.
· You don't have to worry about getting caught with your guitar.
· Guitars don't get pregnant.
· You can share your Guitar with your friends.
· You can play your Guitar any time of the month.
· Guitars don't have parents.
· Guitars don't whine... unless you want them to.
· If your Guitar is flat you can fix it for less than Rs 1,000.
· Your Guitar doesn't care if you never listen to it.
· You don't have to be jealous of the guy who works on your Guitar.
· If you say bad things to your Guitar, you don't have to apologize before you play it again.
· You can play your Guitar as long as you want and it won't get sore.
· You can stop playing your Guitar as soon as you want and it won't get frustrated.
· Your parents won't remain in touch with your old Guitar after you dump it.
· Guitars don't get headaches.
· Guitars don't insult you if you're a bad player.
· Your Guitar never wants a night out with the other Guitars.
· Guitars don't care if you're late.
· You don't have to take a shower before you play your Guitar.
· If your Guitar doesn't look good you can refinish it or get new parts.
· You can play your Guitar the first time you meet it, without having to take it to dinner, see a movie, or meet its mother.
· The only protection you have to wear when playing your Guitar is a decent thumb pick.
· When in mixed company, you can talk about what a great time you had the last time you played your Guitar.
· A guitar has a volume knob.
· If you break a guitar's G-string, it only costs Rs 11 for a new one.
· You can go to a guitar shop and play all the guitars you want for free.
· You can take lessons on how to play a guitar without feeling embarrassed.
· You can rent a guitar without worrying about who rented it before you.
· A guitar doesn't take half of everything you own when you get rid of it.
· You can break a guitars neck when it pisses you off and NOT go to prison
· You can finger it in public and get applause – NOT ARRESTED
· You can use four fingers at a time on it
· You can finger it for hours without it complaining for more
Friday, December 31, 2010
Wednesday, December 15, 2010
Messenger
"When the government fears the people, it is called democracy. When the people fear the government, it is called tyranny." Thomas Jefferson
Tyranny, I think it the correct word to describe environment in the countries where government and government organizations can do anything with its people and don't even care for justice of its people. Everyone of these was enjoying unprecedented power and monopoly until a guy called Julliean Assange started a website called wikileaks.com and started publishing all the secret documents that would have never reached to ordinary people without wikileaks.
Wikileaks, a website started with objective of exposing oppressive regimes in Asia, the former Soviet bloc, Sub-Saharan Africa and the Middle East, but also expect to be of assistance to people of all regions who wish to reveal unethical behaviour in their governments and corporations, published its first document in December 2006 and now it is roaring at 1.2million documents.
What made wikileaks different from other way opening government fraud is that before one has to goto media submit it and then wait while wikileaks provided platform to virtually anybody who gets his hands on classified material, to publish such files online for all to see. In starting, 2008, wikileaks used to simple release documents but in last summer it adopted journalistic approach and started editing and posting views about document. In july wikileaks partnered with main stream media by giving them early look at Afghan War diary. In November it published 250,000 diplomatic cables , of USA, describing tension across the globe and the reaction was huge. Wikileaks was all over in media,news paper,Tv, magazines and what not? It earned lot of fame to wikileaks and lot of criticism and wince of politicians.
Founder of EFF (Electronic Frontier Foundation) and lyricist John Perry wrote “The field of battle is WikiLeaks, You are the troops”. Last week when US government attempted to stop wikileaks those “troops” fought back. When US senator Joe Liberman urged amazon.com to stop wikileaks and amazon did it, thote troops attacked amazon.com, and by two days WikiLeaks listed 507 Web addresses that it said were hosting the site worldwide. When PayPal, MasterCard and Visa all blocked donations to WikiLeaks. WikiLeaks' backers fought back, though their hacker attacked on some of the sites that shut off WikiLeaks funding may be less effective. After some political pressure and wikileaks proclaim that it was done for “no obvious reason”, the accounts were restored[wikipedia].
While founder is Jullian Paul Assange is behind the bars in sweden under charges of unprotected sex, every one is eagerly waiting for result of this fight between David and Goliath.
Tyranny, I think it the correct word to describe environment in the countries where government and government organizations can do anything with its people and don't even care for justice of its people. Everyone of these was enjoying unprecedented power and monopoly until a guy called Julliean Assange started a website called wikileaks.com and started publishing all the secret documents that would have never reached to ordinary people without wikileaks.
Wikileaks, a website started with objective of exposing oppressive regimes in Asia, the former Soviet bloc, Sub-Saharan Africa and the Middle East, but also expect to be of assistance to people of all regions who wish to reveal unethical behaviour in their governments and corporations, published its first document in December 2006 and now it is roaring at 1.2million documents.
What made wikileaks different from other way opening government fraud is that before one has to goto media submit it and then wait while wikileaks provided platform to virtually anybody who gets his hands on classified material, to publish such files online for all to see. In starting, 2008, wikileaks used to simple release documents but in last summer it adopted journalistic approach and started editing and posting views about document. In july wikileaks partnered with main stream media by giving them early look at Afghan War diary. In November it published 250,000 diplomatic cables , of USA, describing tension across the globe and the reaction was huge. Wikileaks was all over in media,news paper,Tv, magazines and what not? It earned lot of fame to wikileaks and lot of criticism and wince of politicians.
Founder of EFF (Electronic Frontier Foundation) and lyricist John Perry wrote “The field of battle is WikiLeaks, You are the troops”. Last week when US government attempted to stop wikileaks those “troops” fought back. When US senator Joe Liberman urged amazon.com to stop wikileaks and amazon did it, thote troops attacked amazon.com, and by two days WikiLeaks listed 507 Web addresses that it said were hosting the site worldwide. When PayPal, MasterCard and Visa all blocked donations to WikiLeaks. WikiLeaks' backers fought back, though their hacker attacked on some of the sites that shut off WikiLeaks funding may be less effective. After some political pressure and wikileaks proclaim that it was done for “no obvious reason”, the accounts were restored[wikipedia].
While founder is Jullian Paul Assange is behind the bars in sweden under charges of unprotected sex, every one is eagerly waiting for result of this fight between David and Goliath.
Wednesday, April 14, 2010
What being normal means?
1. Normal is anything that makes us forget who we are and what we want. that way we can work in order to produce, reproduce and earn money.
2. Setting out rules for waging war (Geneva Convention)
3. Spending years to study at university to to find at the end of it all that you are unemployed.
4. Working 9-5 everyday at something that gives you no pleasure at all just so that , after 30 years you can retire.
5. Retiring and discovering that you no longer have energy to enjoy life and dying few years later in sheer boredom.
6. Using botox.
7. Believing that power is much more important than money and money is much more important than happiness.
8. Making fun of anyone who seeks happiness rather than money and accusing them of "Lacking Ambition".
9. Never talking to strangers.
10. Saying nasty things about neighbors.
11. Comparing objects like car, house, clothes and defining life according to those comparison instead of trying to find out real reason for being alive.
12. Believing that your parents are always right.
13. Getting married, having children and staying togather long after all love has died ,saying it is for good of children.
14. Criticizing anyone who tries to be different.
15. Waking up each morning to an hysterical alarm on bed side table.
16. Believing absolutely everything that appears in print.
17. Wearing a scrap of colored cloth around your neck which serves no purpose but which answers to name of "Tie".
18. Never asking direct questions , even though other person can guess that what it is you want to know.
19. Keeping smile on our lips even when you are on verge of crying. Feeling sorry for those who show their feelings.
20. Believing that art is either worth of fortune or worth nothing at all.
21. Despising anything that was easy to achieve because if no sacrifice was involved , it obviously is not worth having.
22. Following current fashion trend, however ridiculous or uncomfortable.
23. Believing that all famous people have tons of money saved up.
24. Investing a lot of time and money in caring bout external beauty and caring little about inner beauty.
25. Using every means possible to show that, although you are just ordinary human being, you area far above other mortals.
26. Never looking at anyone in eye when you are traveling on public transport, in case it is interpreted as a sign that you want to get rid off with them.
27. Standing facing the door in lift and pretending you are the only person in lift, regardless of how crowded it is.
28. Never laughing too loudly in restaurant however good the joke is.
29. Always dressing according to season, bare arms in spring and woolen jackets in autumn.
30. Covering christmas tree with fake snow even though winter has nothing to do with birth of Christ.
31. Assuming, as you grow older you are guardian of world's wisdom, even though you haven't necessarily lived enough to know what's right and what's wrong.
32. Going to charity tea party and thinking you have done your bit toward putting an end to social inequality in the worlds.
33. Eating three times a day even though you are not hungry.
34. Believing that other people are always better than you - better looking, more capable richer, more intelligent - and that its very dangerous to step outside your own limits, so its best to do nothing.
35. Using you car as weapon and as impenetrable armour.
36. Swearing when in heavy traffic.
37. Believing that everything you child does wrong is entirely down to company he/she keeps.
38. Marrying the first person who offers you decent position in society. Love can wait.
39. Always saying "i tried" when you didn't try at all.
40. Postponing doing the really interesting things in life for later when you won't have energy for it.
41. Avoiding depression with large daily dose of television / computer.
42. Believing that you can be sure of everything you have achieved.
43. Assuming that women don't like football and men are not interested in home decoration and cooking.
44. Blaming government for all bad things that happen.
45. Thinking that being good, decent, respectable person will man that other will see you as weak , vulnerable and easy to manipulate.
46. Being equally convinced that aggression and rudeness are synonymous with having "Powerful personality".
47. Being afraid of having endoscopy (if you are man) and giving birth (if you are woman)
2. Setting out rules for waging war (Geneva Convention)
3. Spending years to study at university to to find at the end of it all that you are unemployed.
4. Working 9-5 everyday at something that gives you no pleasure at all just so that , after 30 years you can retire.
5. Retiring and discovering that you no longer have energy to enjoy life and dying few years later in sheer boredom.
6. Using botox.
7. Believing that power is much more important than money and money is much more important than happiness.
8. Making fun of anyone who seeks happiness rather than money and accusing them of "Lacking Ambition".
9. Never talking to strangers.
10. Saying nasty things about neighbors.
11. Comparing objects like car, house, clothes and defining life according to those comparison instead of trying to find out real reason for being alive.
12. Believing that your parents are always right.
13. Getting married, having children and staying togather long after all love has died ,saying it is for good of children.
14. Criticizing anyone who tries to be different.
15. Waking up each morning to an hysterical alarm on bed side table.
16. Believing absolutely everything that appears in print.
17. Wearing a scrap of colored cloth around your neck which serves no purpose but which answers to name of "Tie".
18. Never asking direct questions , even though other person can guess that what it is you want to know.
19. Keeping smile on our lips even when you are on verge of crying. Feeling sorry for those who show their feelings.
20. Believing that art is either worth of fortune or worth nothing at all.
21. Despising anything that was easy to achieve because if no sacrifice was involved , it obviously is not worth having.
22. Following current fashion trend, however ridiculous or uncomfortable.
23. Believing that all famous people have tons of money saved up.
24. Investing a lot of time and money in caring bout external beauty and caring little about inner beauty.
25. Using every means possible to show that, although you are just ordinary human being, you area far above other mortals.
26. Never looking at anyone in eye when you are traveling on public transport, in case it is interpreted as a sign that you want to get rid off with them.
27. Standing facing the door in lift and pretending you are the only person in lift, regardless of how crowded it is.
28. Never laughing too loudly in restaurant however good the joke is.
29. Always dressing according to season, bare arms in spring and woolen jackets in autumn.
30. Covering christmas tree with fake snow even though winter has nothing to do with birth of Christ.
31. Assuming, as you grow older you are guardian of world's wisdom, even though you haven't necessarily lived enough to know what's right and what's wrong.
32. Going to charity tea party and thinking you have done your bit toward putting an end to social inequality in the worlds.
33. Eating three times a day even though you are not hungry.
34. Believing that other people are always better than you - better looking, more capable richer, more intelligent - and that its very dangerous to step outside your own limits, so its best to do nothing.
35. Using you car as weapon and as impenetrable armour.
36. Swearing when in heavy traffic.
37. Believing that everything you child does wrong is entirely down to company he/she keeps.
38. Marrying the first person who offers you decent position in society. Love can wait.
39. Always saying "i tried" when you didn't try at all.
40. Postponing doing the really interesting things in life for later when you won't have energy for it.
41. Avoiding depression with large daily dose of television / computer.
42. Believing that you can be sure of everything you have achieved.
43. Assuming that women don't like football and men are not interested in home decoration and cooking.
44. Blaming government for all bad things that happen.
45. Thinking that being good, decent, respectable person will man that other will see you as weak , vulnerable and easy to manipulate.
46. Being equally convinced that aggression and rudeness are synonymous with having "Powerful personality".
47. Being afraid of having endoscopy (if you are man) and giving birth (if you are woman)
Paulo Coelho Roxxxx
Sunday, February 14, 2010
Lol land
I read dis on lol land ....
n its really funny...
so i m sharing it here wid u...
njoy...
________________________________________
The Impossible test
Mathematics
1.What is 1+1? (Do not fall into the obvious trap of writing '2', you have to find 1+1 for extremely large values of 1).
2.If my wife is five years older than I would have been when I got married to her, and five years younger than my mother's current age, explain why I do not have a wife.
3.Using only a ruler and compasses, become the Prime Minister of India.
4.Use the Before-After slimming advertisements put out by VLCC to prove that all numbers (weights) are equal to zero. Next, use the VLCC price catalogue to prove that all numbers are equal to infinity.
Geography
1.Go to Hell.
2.Go around the world in 80 days. You can use as much money as you want, but you are not allowed to apply for a visa anywhere. Also, you have to be back by the time the exam ends (in fifteen minutes).
History
1.Paste your Internet History here (without deleting anything :P).
2.Conduct a general election in the next five minutes, and beat the Congress and BJP combined. You will get extra marks if you help the Left to get any votes.
3.Explain, in not less than three million words, what would have happened if the British had not taken over India. Be concise.
Science
1.Discover three new Newtonian Laws to explain any one Mithun Chakraborty or Rajnikanth movie. If three is too few, you can use up to three million.
2.Discover three new species before the end of this exam. If you want, a ship is available to take you to the New World.
3.Create a product, using only a test-tube and water, that will actually do what Fair and Lovely claims to do.
4.Find a cure for AIDS. too easy common cold.
TV and Bollywood
1.Sign up for Rakhi ka Swayamvar.
2.Watch five hours of Star Plus from 6 PM - 11 PM, without the use of oxygen or other life support. You will be strapped to your chair.
3.In five minutes, dress up so that Govinda looks more decent than you.
4.You are to go and sleep on a pavement. When you are ready, Salman Khan will come driving down the road. Continue sleeping. For bonus points, come back to the exam after he's killed you.
English
1.Will you do frandship with me?
The Toughest of All
1.Answer this question.
2.Run around the streets shouting 'I love Lol-land'.
n its really funny...
so i m sharing it here wid u...
njoy...
________________________________________
The Impossible test
Instructions
* lol
* Kya aap paanchvi pass se tez hain?
* You have 15 minutes
* Jai Mata Di Let's Rock
Mathematics
1.What is 1+1? (Do not fall into the obvious trap of writing '2', you have to find 1+1 for extremely large values of 1).
2.If my wife is five years older than I would have been when I got married to her, and five years younger than my mother's current age, explain why I do not have a wife.
3.Using only a ruler and compasses, become the Prime Minister of India.
4.Use the Before-After slimming advertisements put out by VLCC to prove that all numbers (weights) are equal to zero. Next, use the VLCC price catalogue to prove that all numbers are equal to infinity.
Geography
1.Go to Hell.
2.Go around the world in 80 days. You can use as much money as you want, but you are not allowed to apply for a visa anywhere. Also, you have to be back by the time the exam ends (in fifteen minutes).
History
1.Paste your Internet History here (without deleting anything :P).
2.Conduct a general election in the next five minutes, and beat the Congress and BJP combined. You will get extra marks if you help the Left to get any votes.
3.Explain, in not less than three million words, what would have happened if the British had not taken over India. Be concise.
Science
1.Discover three new Newtonian Laws to explain any one Mithun Chakraborty or Rajnikanth movie. If three is too few, you can use up to three million.
2.Discover three new species before the end of this exam. If you want, a ship is available to take you to the New World.
3.Create a product, using only a test-tube and water, that will actually do what Fair and Lovely claims to do.
4.Find a cure for AIDS. too easy common cold.
TV and Bollywood
1.Sign up for Rakhi ka Swayamvar.
2.Watch five hours of Star Plus from 6 PM - 11 PM, without the use of oxygen or other life support. You will be strapped to your chair.
3.In five minutes, dress up so that Govinda looks more decent than you.
4.You are to go and sleep on a pavement. When you are ready, Salman Khan will come driving down the road. Continue sleeping. For bonus points, come back to the exam after he's killed you.
English
1.Will you do frandship with me?
The Toughest of All
1.Answer this question.
2.Run around the streets shouting 'I love Lol-land'.
Hope you enjoyed...
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